Tuesday, September 26, 2006

PMS Bitchfest

Oy PMS!!! Give me strength! I'm on BCP's so I assume that I don't ovulate but I still get the stupid cravings, acne and my metabolism goes right out the friggin window. I can't stop eating!

Everything pisses me off or makes me cry. Right now I'm watching the View (thanks Rosie!) and they're doing a segment on picky eaters. Well I'm sorry but if I serve my broccoli hating 8 y/o broccoli in a Sun Dried Tomato Tortilla cut out like a Jack-o-Lantern he'd laugh his head off. Kids are way smarter than we give them credit for.

Today my food intake is as follows:

1 piece whole wheat toast w/ peanut butter
1/2 a Red Delicious Apple
Pretzel stick
Red Fat Ritz Cracker dipped in yet again peanut butter
1 Sandwich of Turkey on Whole Wheat
2 Oreos (Damn you Ron!!)
1 Kirkland Fruit Snack pack

And of course we're having stupid Sloppy Joes for dinner. Repeat the mantra "DO NOT EAT OREOS, DO NOT EAT OREOS!" Seriously I'm half tempted to chuck them but my frugal self would say "what a half bag of Oreos! don't you waste!" Or I'd chuck them and retrieve them and eat the whole bag. What I'll have to end up doing is chucking them and squirting them with dish soap just like Miranda did w/ cake in Sex and the City.

Who wants to join me at the Betty Crocker Clinic?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ha! This one's too funny! Just visiting you via Welborn, and glad I did! I just ranted a little bit (ok, a lot!) on my own misery of pms-ing. It's got a good 'Dear Kotex' letter in there from another blog - check it out, it may give you a good chuckle. In the meantime, if you do throw away the Oreos, make sure you throw it MY way! Dear God, woman, don't waste the Oreos!!!! Ha!

karrie said...

The Betty Crocker Clinc? bwhahaha!

It does not sound too out of control, Amber.

Anonymous said...

LMAO!!! Can I get a suite there?? I may need to be there long term.